Sunday, November 25, 2012


Try to remember what you gave to your beloved the last time you had a chance to express your love with a gift. Was it a rose? Or was it jewelry? Did you say anything to adorn your gift with significance? If yes, was it something that went straight from your heart, or have you spent a long time trying to make it sound as if it did? Now, I’m sure that your gift was beautiful, and giving beauty, letting it slip into your beloved’s heart is very important, but was that beauty naturally meant for her? 

If you can give a necklace, a ring, or any other jewelry to a woman, it’s great, if you do it with true love, trying to show the deepness and importance of your affection. But at the same time, if the stone is the most noteworthy symbol of love you could think of, try thinking again, because your love might be not that deep after all. 

Giving a jewel to your woman may truly be significant, and you should be careful with this. I know that, as a woman, I actually should like such things like trinkets, gems, jewelry, etc, but for some reason, it’s really hard for me to understand how did it happen that all the best gifts suddenly became stone-cold. Gift is not an item. If it was that way, there would be no reason to give it at all. What’s the point in giving something that cannot arise a single sparkle in your beloved’s heart? 

Gifts are feelings, emotions, understanding, knowledge; the whole world actually. That’s why the “standard” gifts are not always the best ones. There’s a whole universe of splendor to be given instead of a withering flower. Anyone can buy a ring, but unspeakable beauty usually is not the one you can get easily, but the one that slips away once you forget about its importance. It is teasing you, charming you, attracting you… leaving you to make you follow it. It makes you feel alive because it makes you dream. 

I guess it would be reasonable to state that the greatest gift you can give to a woman is love, but the one thing you must understand is that it’s not your love to be given; it’s hers to be achieved. How can you give your love, and, at the same time, believe that a woman will love you for just that? If you love, you must see that your love is not the one that’s important in a relationship. You can enjoy it whatever you want, but it doesn’t mean that your lover will ever be able to experience joy from being loved. 

If you can make a woman fall in love with this world, with her body, her mind, her soul, her friends, and her entire life, then you are a great giver. You give without stealing her freedom to love something that’s just not about you. Never award a woman with yourself, or with your love. It cannot ever be enough if she has no love within herself. Better learn to give her love that she lacks to achieve true happiness. If one day you’ll decide that you already gave enough, and instead of letting her to grow on, you’ll put the weights on her wings, she will never love you as strong as she did before. She will never want you as hard as she could. 

People were made to be free, and a gift of freedom is also one of the greatest. If you’re free, you can let your love to flow freely. I couldn’t ever understand why people cling to each other sometimes so cruelly, trying to force their lovers to love them more than anything or anyone else in this world. As if it’s okay to overlap someone’s surge of happiness, and then wait for it to flow to you. 

If you truly wish your gift to be great and worthy, you must not expect anything in return, otherwise your lover will do the same, and both of you are going to stay unsatisfied. To give something really important you’ve got to see your lover’s dreams. You need to learn what it means for her to be happy, and then, once you found out what her greatest dream is, you’ve got to expand it. You should make your lover’s dreams even higher and braver. Teach her to enjoy every second of her life. You can make a woman feel powerful and fearless about whatever comes her way, and it doesn’t mean that she’s not going to need you anymore. It’s just, if you truly love someone, you’d want them to be brave and strong, to be able to face all the troubles of their life. What if you won’t be there when you’re needed..? 

So, what can you give to make your lover happy, besides the roses and jewelries? First, accept the fact that it’s not you, and then, understand that it’s not that simple. A soul of another human being has never been simple anyway. Even if you really love a woman, you love her knowing only that which is visible, but not what stays unrevealed. You might love someone who isn’t even close to self-realization, and it could be a matter of great suffering for both of you. If you’ll grant such a person with the greatest treasures of this world, it would be a kind of cruelty, because when you have everything but yourself, you have nothing. 

Realize the deepness of that statement, and, for once, do something real. Don’t try to get more points. If she loves you, she loves you for just that. You don’t need anything to be loved. You don’t need anything to earn it. However, you might need something to express your love with. If you choose to do it with a gift, pick your gift carefully; it might be important. After all, what you give, you’re going to achieve. 

“The only thing that makes completely no sense in this world is love. It-s so huge, and matters so much, that it’s impossible for us to understand how can we survive it, or live without it at all.”


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